I don't know.
I get asked that a lot. Much of the time I think it's because people think I am nuts.
It's taken some time to really think about it and I still don't know why I wanted to do one. I had no ambition at that time (2007) to see where I could seriously go with it. I quit a good job and relocated to a different city to pursue this more seriously after thinking mid-2008 that maybe it was worth a shot.
Still, I don't know why I started.
So what made me do something crazy like give up stability to pursue something that I may never end up reaching... It's basically a channel for my energy. I've found that instead of putting that energy into thought about things that have happened in my recent lifetime, I'd rather focus it elsewhere.
Instead of turning to alcohol, drugs, or something else as a coping mechanism, I have done something positive for myself. Life is about choices. I hear all too often that people are wallowing in self-pity over their perceived lack of fortune and a tough run at life. While I am somewhat empathetic, at the same time I wonder what they have done for themselves; I am a firm believer that if you don't help yourself then nobody else can.
Life is full of paths and choices. An envisioned outcome rarely comes about through the path that you see it happening on. I know that there are multiple paths to the same goal, so taking positives from a negative will only create a stronger drive to find that alternate route.
Channel your energy.